I was born in a one-room wooden structure in the serene countryside of Westmoreland, Jamaica. On November 9th, 1990, I breathe my first breath into a family of dysfunction and a generation crippled by limiting beliefs. My father was never around to show me how a man is supposed to treat a woman. My mother couldn't teach me how to become a phenomenal woman because she was programmed to being a strong black woman.
As a child growing up, I suffered from low self-esteem. Still, very few people would realize as I was a professional at hiding behind a mask called "A Smile." My childhood was crippled by verbal, emotional, and sometimes physical abuse. Ill health became a crotch, I enjoyed it when I was sick because I thought I would somehow get a little affection, some words of affirmation which I craved so much but my desire was never satisfied.
At eighteen years old, I got married to the first man that told me he loves me and gave me some affection. His Words to me were like the oasis in the desert. But my minute of happiness was cut short when he told me three months into our marriage that he didn't love me. " I remember the first day I saw you, there was this light on you and I knew I had to marry you. I marry you for the light but Ann-Marie I do not love you, he said"
Those words cut like a knife, but I did try to stay and make my marriage work. But ever so often, when I was alone, I would dream and see myself as a woman who is loved and who gives love unconditionally. I would see this woman in me. I would see myself as a woman who inspires and touch other girls and women to pursue their purpose and become phenomenal.
Then one night, he told me that we aren't right for each other. He told me how broken I was and mocked my childhood. I remember telling him that I know I am broken, but I want a man who was willing to soothe my pain and kiss my scars. And though I didn't say anything further to him that night, I promised myself that the next time he told me he didn't love me and didn't want to be with me, I would respect myself enough to walk away.
March of 2009, just five months after marriage, I packed my bags and kissed heartbreak goodbye.
It wasn't easy after kissing heartbreak goodbye; the struggle got even more real. Anxiety was my daily companion ever since the tender age of fourteen, but when I walked out of that marriage, depression became a permanent tenant. On a few different occasions, she would bring along her cousin's suicidal thoughts and pessimism, unwelcomed guests in my heart. Not to mention the loneliness of not having a support unit, coupled with the dire financial situation, poverty, and worst of all, a lack of opportunity.
Nothing caused me more considerable distress than being an A Player living a B life. I wanted the opportunity of self-expression, but I got none until...
I Found God; I found people who do the same work that I do now, and they helped me to learn the secret of God, the mystery of me, and the Language of the world.
My childhood and early life was nothing to be celebrated. It was instead something to heal from. Today I am not only healed, but I am healing others. I tapped into my inherent phenomenal nature and cultivated the gifts and talents given to me by God.
I once asked The Purpose Giver the reason for my existence, and His gentle, still small voice said, " Ann-Marie, your purpose is to help people find their purpose." I see myself as a farmer who heals. I don't cultivate crops; I cultivate people. I am an Inner Gardener. I build, and I plant the positive, and I root up, pull down, and tear down the negative. I am A Prophetess Ordained By God for such a time as this.
Along my journey, I have discovered two things; all women are born extraordinary and phenomenal; however, our family, our culture, the media, and society sometimes program us to be ordinary. The second thing I have learned is that we all can cultivate the qualities that will make us unforgettable.
I am a woman of unlimited potential, who by choice, is creating a life by design through faith in God, focus, and a commitment to become the best version of myself. I want to go down in history as the woman who rose from the dust to purpose, the woman who rises from the ashes to become a diamond, a mother of this generation, simply because she was born To Be. I am Ann-Marie Graham, a phenomenal, phenomenal woman that's me.
And Beloved Woman I Want The Same For You!!
That Is The Reason Why Spirit Led Me to Create Up From The Dust To A Life Of Purpose As Well As The Phenomenal Woman Academy!!
Certified Life Coach, Motivational Speaker